The Sound of Silence
I miss the sound of Nora.
I never thought of myself as an auditory person. I’ve always been more visual: I love the written word; I love looking at photographs and art, but I never realized until Nora died how much I enjoyed the sounds of living with her: the comfort of hearing her paws cross the floor, the quiet scratch at the door, or the clink of her water bowl. Nora was always a hushed dog, but the reality of her absolute silence is deafening.
Our house – my life – is so quiet now, and it's one of the most difficult and unexpected things I’ve had to cope with in this grieving process. Now that she’s gone, I realize that two decades of her noises in our home were very much a part of my life. The absence of those sounds can strike me with agony when I least expect it. I miss the sounds of life – our life.
But some afternoons, like today, the silence is palpable, and it seems impossible that I can function without her. For over 30 years, I have been responsible for other living beings. Who will take care of them now? I am having to mourn that part of life as well.
Acknowledging the full reality of the loss may take me months, years, or a lifetime, but it will be done in a time that is right for me. No one teaches you how to mourn. No one tells you the silence in your home after the death will be excruciatingly loud. When that someone you loved is no longer there, the lack of their presence, the silence, becomes piercing. It becomes the reality of the “presence of the absence.”
Even though your pet is an animal, one fact remains: your pet is also part of your family. The hardest thing to bear when they go from us, these quiet friends, is that they carry away with them so many years of our own lives.
The bond you create feels like part of your identity or even like an extension of your soul. So when a pet dies, you don’t just lose an animal. You lose a cherished loved one.
You lose a piece of yourself.
Artichoke & Prosciutto Pasta Salad with a Creamy Sun-Dried Tomato Vinaigrette
INGREDIENTS
For the Pasta
- 1 pound bow tie pasta or any bite-size pasta of choice
- 3 ounces thinly sliced prosciutto, torn into bite-size pieces
- 2 (15-ounce) cans of quartered artichoke hearts, drained
- 1 1/2 (8-ounce) jars julienned sun-dried tomatoes, drained and oil reserved
- 8 ounces mozzarella balls
- 1/2 cup Greek olives pitted and sliced
- 1/2 cup freshly torn basil leaves
For the Vinaigrette
- 3/4 cup reserved sun-dried tomato oil (use extra virgin to make up the difference)
- 1 tablespoon julienned sun-dried tomatoes
- 1/4 cup red wine vinegar
- 1/4 cup lemon juice
- 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
- 1/4 cup Pecorino Romano grated
- 2 teaspoons dried oregano
- 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
- 3 cloves chopped garlic
- salt and pepper to taste
- 2-3 tablespoons water, optional for desired consistency
INSTRUCTIONS
For the Vinaigrette
- Preheat the oven to 400° F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and arrange the prosciutto in an even layer. Transfer to the oven and cook 8-10 minutes, until the prosciutto is crisp. Remove and cool.
- Cook pasta in salted water until al dente, then drain. Drizzle and mix with olive oil. Allow to cool.
- In a large bowl, mix pasta, mozzarella, olives, artichoke hearts, and sun-dried tomatoes.
- Pour 1/2 of the dressing on top of the pasta and mix well. If you need more dressing, add a small amount until you achieve desired coverage. The remaining dressing can be served on the side or saved for a future salad during the week. Top with fresh basil and fresh cracked pepper.
- Either serve cold or at room temperature. The flavors will intensify the longer it is refrigerated.
