2020 has been a tumultuous year. From civil unrest to the election, the world has had a lot to say, and some of it has not been kind. It felt the majority of the conversation had to do with people who live, look, and believe as I do – American, Southern, Christian, Conservative, and White. Because of geographical bias, maligned character beliefs were formed. I felt my voice was not only discredited but overnight, I became public enemy #1. Irrespective of my individual character, each day protestors demanded an apology. But I ask you, how can one apologize for her DNA? Isn't this the exact systemic mentality we are desperately trying to eradicate? I was aware that, at least vocally, I stuck out like a poorly placed puzzle piece. While I don’t have a Southern drawl that calls to mind bluegrass bands and “Forrest Gump," I am easily identifiable. There seems to be a lot of people who are not from the South, but think they know everything there is to know about being Southern. I’ve discussed this topic before I know, and I guess it’s because I’m passionate about it. But it’s also because I continue to see common misconceptions in the media regarding the area I love.
Stereotypes are a bit like air: invisible but always present. The thing is, the South is not a monolithic cultural landscape. The truth is Southerners come in all shapes and sizes, with a more diverse population than in the Midwest and Northeast. Traits are exaggerated and labeled to a group, and they contribute to a dysfunctional class system. People have much to say about stereotypes. Some loudly shout that stereotypes are wrong in all situations; others argue that they would not exist if they were not true. Beyond moral disagreement, stereotypes do affect our society, and they can cause a lot of damage. If you have trouble understanding exactly what a stereotype is, and how it could be bad, here is what you should know about the South.
Some Southerners have heavy accents, some have light accents like me, and others don't have any accents at all. In the South, we are living a more homogenized society with people regularly traveling across state boundaries. Southerners don’t talk funny. They talk Southern. For some unknown reason, some people believe that everyone in the South is uneducated and ignorant. And they think that just because you might speak slowly means you also think slowly. And, sadly, some people suggest that everyone from the South is racist and homophobic. Frustratingly, some people believe Southerners to be deprived of culture, never mind the fact that the South is the birthplace of great art, music, and literature. And, finally, some people believe all Southerners actually date — and marry — their cousins, forever keeping it all in the family. And while I do have a lot of kinfolk, I’ve never kissed a single one inappropriately.
There's more to the South than just the Grand Ole Opry and fried food. While most of us agree we are kind of obsessed with Dolly, Willy, and Elvis, Muscle Shoals in Alabama gave us Southern rock bands like Lynyrd Skynyrd. In New Orleans, the birthplace of Louis Armstrong, the jazz scene is ever prevalent. Mississippi gave us blues legend BB King. Believe it or not, we don’t all listen to country music 24/7 while riding along in our pick-up truck waving a confederate flag while eating fried chicken. And while Southerners have a reputation for their unhealthy eating habits, not all Southern food is cooked or covered in animal grease. We eat more than collard greens, rutabagas, lima beans, turnips, and black-eyed peas. While I may like my sweet tea and cornbread as much as the next country gal, Southern stereotypes are usually just that — stereotypes. They take away a lot of the nuance of the region.
The stereotype that people from the South are inbred speaks for itself and is extremely offensive. I'm not sure where the stereotype started but horror films like Deliverance certainly didn’t help. We don’t all play the fiddle or sit out on the porch banjo dueling the day away. In pop culture, the South gets a bad rap: We're hicks or "by golly" simple folk on our best days and racist bigots on our worst. The South is home to some of the poorest people in the nation, and to label them as a redneck or a hillbilly is not only defamatory but insensitive. I can say without a doubt, racism is alive and well throughout our country, not just imprisoned in the South. Some of us date or marry Black men: according to a 2012 Pew Research study, two of the top three states for white-black married couples are (shocker) southern states: Virginia and North Carolina. Some of us voted happily for a Black president. It seems Southern Christians have a particularly bad reputation, but not all Southerners are judgmental, nor hypocritical of people who don’t believe as we do. Racism exists everywhere. Pretending it only exists in the South lets a lot of white Northerners off the hook when it comes to taking responsibility for their own privilege. For me, being from the South opened a whole new window onto diversity, and staying in the South taught me to do some painful self-examination. There are good, kind Christians in the South who will love you as a brother/sister no matter your lifestyle or beliefs. Trust me. I’m one of them.
So stop putting us in a box, you non-southerners. We are writers, we are waitresses, we are nurses and teachers, we are bankers and politicians, artists and clergy; we are nuns and witches, we are poets and photographers. We are gay, straight, black, white, and brown. We are also damn proud of our Southern roots and won't let anybody take that away from us. The Southern states are heavy with history which reaches far beyond the Civil War. History is important to us and we honor our part in the making of this great country. More importantly, the majority of us believe in an inclusive community. We have lived longer side by side with our neighbors of all colors than the rest of America, and neighbors become an extension of ourselves. I've cried more tears than water in the Mississippi River for people who claim otherwise. We teach, believe, and practice The Golden Rule. My mother always said that when you point a finger at someone, there will always be three fingers pointing back at you. There are things I ask God for forgiveness for every day, but being American, Southern, Christian, Conservative, or White isn't one of them. Stereotypical ideologies hinder us in advance from knowing the truth and dangerously limit our perception of the world. Take the time to get to know someone before you slap a label on them because, in my South, we welcome all outsiders. I know more people who will receive you with open arms and an open heart than those who will not. Just make sure to leave your judgments behind. You won't be needing them here.
