Mediterranean Cod en Papillote (Fish in Parchment Paper) & Lemon Feta Potatoes

When I was young my sisters and I used to play a game where we would wish for special powers. The options were: to breathe underwater, speak to the animals, fly, or be invisible. We never chose invisibility, but some women say that’s what they get as they age.

While I didn't inherit Harry Potter's invisibility cloak, just like magic when I turned 50, I realized that there were times when people didn't seem to notice me anymore. As I aged, I felt increasingly unseen—marginalized by the younger, the newer, the perkier. It's a phenomenon for the elderly, except that many older men seem to stay visible all the way down to the Depends aisle.

Invisibility hurts, and not just our feelings. It's not just that younger people can't see us, they also behave as if we no longer have anything worthwhile to contribute to civilization as they know it. It can be disparaging and lonely. My aches and groans had become my new battle cry.

Never underestimate the power of being seen. It's a real superpower. What we believe about ourselves is critical. The way we speak to ourselves – and about ourselves – matters. Many aging women are stepping out of the shadows and living a renaissance in the second half of life. The shift in mindset starts at the grassroots level. It begins with you. The more we show up for ourselves, the more we can be seen.

It’s so exhausting to be a woman in the world, and it can be scary. It still requires vigilance, but I no longer feel that I’m being constantly evaluated, and it’s a huge relief.

I have so much more space in my head. Other people’s opinions have become less important over time because when you’re not being watched, you’ve got a little more room in which to observe.

Here’s what I’ve learned: People who love you think you’re beautiful. They care about your feelings. They’re interested in what you have to say. I decide if I’m relevant or interesting or valuable, not them. So I’m embracing middle age, with all its pains and surprises.

You can’t control other people but you can control the way you show up in the world. You can fill yourself with so much strength, encouragement, and daring that suddenly, what’s happening outside of you matters a bit less. Surround yourself with women who genuinely love themselves and who are living lives you respect.

My advice to women is this: be your badass self —  all of yourself. By showing up authentically, you are sending the message to every other woman that you matter and so do they.

Life is tiring. Sometimes we only have enough energy to get through the day. Some of us feel like we’ve earned a rest. Why should we have to keep pushing, trying, striving, and straining when we’ve already done so much of that? It’s valid to want to sit back, rest, and oversee the changing of the guard. But, if you’re the kind of woman who isn’t ready to relax just yet – who wants to be seen, in surround sound, Technicolor glory – there is one way to make sure that happens: choose to be seen.

Keeping going. Keep moving. Keep dreaming. And keep being wildly, loudly present.

Julia Child enrolled at Le Cordon Bleu in Paris when she was 37 years old. She didn't publish her first cookbook until she was 49 years old because it took her nine years to complete.

Toni Morrison did not explode in the public eye until 1993 when she became the first African American woman to win the Nobel Prize for Literature. She was 62.

Hillary Clinton was 68 when she ran for the US Presidency.

Grandma Moses began painting at age 78 and her work was featured in MoMA and on the cover of Time.

Iris Apfel Was a Beauty Icon until she died at 102.

I'm not here to speak for all women but hear this. No one is going to put this baby in a corner.