When I turned 50, I waxed romantically that I had reached the proverbial orange cone indicating the turnaround point in my life. The challenges of my first 50 years were behind me, I opined, and from that point on, I expected my life to follow a much easier, downhill course. Boy was I wrong.
I assumed I would feel some relief now that my youthful burdens had been lifted, but in contrast, my thoughts turned to all the fun I never had because of my fear of failure. Being anxious had become a self-inflicted handicap, and if flow is what makes life worth living, I was stuck in a quagmire.
"You missed out." Is there another sentence that can strike such anxiety in a person other than "We need to talk?” The Fear Of Missing Out, or FOMO in millennial-speak, goes far beyond its intended meaning when you start to look at your whole life. While FOMO may be an issue for Generation Y, when you are on the downhill journey you feel more like Generation Why? which suffers more from FOF – Fear Of Failure. Like FOMO when you're so tuned in to the 'other,' you lose your authentic sense of self. This constant fear of missing out by not trying means you are not participating as a real person in your own world.
One of the major issues I faced as a child was being raised by a narcissistic parent. I learned very early to serve other people’s needs. I was taught if you were good at something, you needed to be great. If you were great, you needed to be better. And if you weren’t the best, you should do something else. I never developed an authentic identity, so I cocooned myself in a world of mediocracy. I was living a safe helmet-wearing, knee pad, mouth guard kind of life.
I was a hopeless people-pleaser, and I had no idea what I actually liked. To the point where I felt like nothing would give me joy, nothing would be fun, and nothing would make me happy. But with help, I am learning to find my authentic self. I now understand my inborn personality traits, I recognize my natural strengths and weaknesses, and I am aware of my true likes and dislikes. I’m learning what puts my brain in flow and what I needed to do to experience pure joy.
I now appreciate the real me versus the one who put on a show to benefit other people. Very few of us feel comfortable being our true selves because we don’t see ourselves as remarkable. We don’t realize that our authenticity is the one thing that makes us unique, and our successes and failures are determined by our self-worth.
It’s been said that the definition of hell is where you meet the person you could have become, and that some people die at 25 but aren’t buried until 75. I could easily have been one of those tragedies. Life is short, but it’s not over. Growing up with a can’t do attitude, killed my desire to follow my heart, but something shifted when I finally reached that orange cone. I realized I could either continue to hold on tight to Life's handlebars or I could lift my butt off the seat, raise my arms in the air and let the wind whip through my helmetless hair.
We are all going to come to the finish line eventually whether I like it or not. While I don’t want the race to end anytime soon, I do want to cross that line with a sense of pride. And while life doesn't hand out participation trophies just for showing up, maybe I’ll be awarded a small ribbon for Most Improved. And if I should get there before you, I'll be the one holding the "WAY TO GO!" sign cheering you on.
Mediterranean Oven Roasted Chicken Gyros with Homemade Feta Tzatziki Sauce
INGREDIENTS
For the Gyros
- 1/2 cup full-fat Greek yogurt
- 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
- 2 pounds of boneless skinless chicken breasts or thighs, cut into bite-sized pieces
- 2 lemons juiced (or 1/4 of a cup)
- 8 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 extra large or 2 medium shallots, chopped
- 1 tablespoon dried thyme
- 1 tablespoon smoked paprika
- 2 tablespoons fresh oregano, chopped
- 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes
- 1 teaspoon each of kosher salt and fresh black pepper
- Serve with fresh nanna or pita with lettuce, red onion, and fresh dill
For the Feta Tzatziki Sauce
- 2 cups grated cucumber (from about 1 medium 10-ounce cucumber, no need to peel or seed the cucumber first, grate on the large holes of your box grater)
- 1 ½ cups plain Greek yogurt
- 3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
- 3 tablespoons chopped fresh dill
- 1 tablespoon lemon juice
- 2 medium clove garlic, pressed or minced
- ½ teaspoon fine sea salt
- ½ teaspoon black pepper
- 4 ounces feta cheese, crumbled
INSTRUCTIONS
For the Gyros
- In a bowl, combine all the chicken gyros ingredients. Let marinate for 30 minutes at room temperature or up to overnight in the refrigerator. The chicken will be much juicier the longer you allow it to marinade.
- Preheat the oven to 425° F. Arrange the chicken on a baking sheet. Bake 15 minutes, toss, and bake another 5-10 minutes, or until cooked through. Switch the oven to broil. Broil for 1-2 minutes, until the chicken chars are on the edges (watch carefully). To assemble, stuff each naan or pita with tzatziki, then lettuce, and chicken. Add red onions and fresh dill.
For the Feta Tzatziki Sauce
- Working with one big handful at a time, lightly squeeze the grated cucumber between your palms over the sink to remove excess moisture. Transfer the squeezed cucumber to a serving bowl, and repeat with the remaining cucumber.
- Add the yogurt, olive oil, herbs, lemon juice, garlic, and salt to the bowl, feta and stir to blend. Let the mixture rest for 5 minutes to allow the flavors to meld. Taste and add additional chopped fresh herbs, lemon juice, and/or salt, if necessary (I thought this batch was just right as-is).
- Serve tzatziki immediately or chill for later. Leftover tzatziki keeps well, chilled, for about 4 days.
