I would love to have one afternoon with the girl I was at fifteen. Preferably before she made some of her more questionable decisions, although I suspect she'd consider my advice an unwelcome interruption.
I'd take her hand and tell her that she is going to be all right, even during the years when absolutely nothing seems to go according to plan. I'd explain that the people she considers terribly important will eventually become faces she has to squint at in an old yearbook. Meanwhile, some of the greatest loves of her life are walking around somewhere, completely unaware that she exists.
Imagine knowing that when you're young enough to believe your entire future depends on being invited to a party.
Some people will find their calling before they've finished school, while others won't discover what they're capable of until fifty. Some of the happiest people she'll meet will have accomplished very little that would impress a stranger. It will take her years to understand how much that matters.
She'll eventually understand that the people worth admiring aren't necessarily the ones everybody notices.
I remember the Bumblebee Girl from this song's music video. She walked onto a stage in her little costume, ready to dance, with the beautiful certainty that everyone would clap. She had no reason to expect laughter. When the audience laughed, she could have gone home, taken off those wings, and decided never to dance in public again.
How many children have done precisely that, abandoning something they adored because somebody made them feel foolish for loving it?
Instead, that little girl kept traveling until she discovered a field full of people dressed just like her.
I think about the distance she had to travel. Not everyone finds friendship in the classroom, the neighborhood, or the town where they grow up. Some have to leave everything familiar before discovering how wonderful life can feel among people who appreciate them.
I wish young people understood that the world doesn't end at the edge of their social circle. There are people they haven't met, places they haven't visited, and interests they haven't discovered. Their present circumstances cannot possibly account for all the happiness their future might hold.
There is enough heartache in this world without becoming the reason someone loses a little of their joy. If a person is brave enough to show you what makes them happy, treat that happiness with care. You have no idea how much courage it may have taken to share it.
You'll meet the same people on the way down that you passed on the way up. Be kind to them regardless of which direction either of you is traveling.
We can take an unlikely dream seriously, applaud an imperfect effort, and remind someone that the world has room for whatever makes them different.
I can't go back and give that younger girl the afternoon I wish we'd had. I can't tell her which people will matter, or convince her that the things she's embarrassed about may someday become the things she loves most about herself.
What I can do is remember her whenever someone trusts me enough to share something they're excited about. Especially when it's something I don't understand.
There are plenty of people willing to explain why a dream is foolish. Imagine being the reason someone decides to pursue it anyway.
Be the person who believes in someone before they ever have the chance to doubt themselves.
Classic Drive-Thru Chili
Serves 8–10
When Wendy’s opened in our town in the early eighties, I thought chili in a paper cup was a revelation. Add a Frosty, and I was sold. This is my homemade take on the drive-thru favorite I’ve loved ever since.
Ingredients
- 2½ pounds ground beef
- 1 large yellow onion, finely diced (about 1½ cups)
- 1 large red bell pepper, finely diced
- 3 celery stalks, finely diced (about 1¼ cups)
- 3 garlic cloves, minced
- 1 (29-ounce) can tomato sauce
- 1 (14.5-ounce) can diced tomatoes, with juice
- 1 (15-ounce) can dark red kidney beans, undrained
- 1 (15-ounce) can pinto beans, undrained
- 1 to 2 cups water or beef stock, optional, only if needed at the end
- 2½ tablespoons chili powder
- 1½ teaspoons ground cumin
- 1 teaspoon paprika
- 1 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1 teaspoon onion powder
- ½ teaspoon granulated sugar
- ⅜ teaspoon cayenne pepper
- 1½ teaspoons kosher salt, plus more to taste
- ½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
- Sour cream, thinly sliced fresh jalapeños, and tortilla chips for serving
Instructions
- Place the ground beef in a large pot or Dutch oven over medium heat. Cook for 7 to 10 minutes, stirring occasionally and breaking it into very small pieces, until browned and no pink remains. Spoon off excess fat, leaving about 1 tablespoon in the pot for flavor.
- Add the onion, red bell pepper, and celery. Cook, stirring often, for 8 to 10 minutes, until the vegetables are very soft and the mixture looks almost stew-like. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute more.
- Stir in the tomato sauce, diced tomatoes with their juice, kidney beans, and pinto beans with their liquid. Add the chili powder, cumin, paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, sugar, cayenne, salt, and black pepper. Stir well.
- Bring to a gentle simmer over medium heat, then reduce the heat to low. Cook uncovered for 45 minutes to 1 hour, stirring occasionally, until the chili is cohesive and the flavors are fully blended.
- After simmering, check the consistency. If the chili is too thick, stir in water or beef stock a little at a time, up to 2 cups total, until it reaches your preferred consistency. You may not need any. Simmer a few more minutes to warm through.
- Taste and adjust the salt and other seasonings if needed. The chili should be mild, savory, and slightly sweet, not overly spicy. Ladle into bowls and serve hot, with sour cream, sliced jalapeños, and tortilla chips on the side, if desired.
Storage & Kitchen Notes
Refrigerate: Store in an airtight container for up to 4 days.
Freeze: Freeze for up to 3 months. Thaw overnight in the refrigerator.
Reheat: Warm gently over medium-low heat, stirring often. Add a splash of water or beef stock only if needed to loosen.
